Monday Morning Mehta 12/13/04

Edition # 97
December 13, 2004

Eagles/NFL

As we've said here many times before, a win is a win in the NFL. The Eagles won an ugly, sloppy, defensive struggle 17-14 over the Redskins in a game which Washington pretty much handed the Eagles the game. The Eagles now stand 12-1, one NFC victory away from clinching home field throughout the playoffs.

Game Positives:

a. Hard hitting game. One thing that pisses me off (for no legit reason) is when other teams and announcers portray the Eagles as a 'soft' team. That is why I really enjoy it when the Eagles win a game like yesterday. Although the Redskins offense is awful, their defense is formidable. Hence seeing the Eagles tough out a W is a good thing. This team can play smash mouth with the best of them.

b. That hit by Josh Parry. Shawn Springs was knocked out cold. Great, clean hit by Parry (for the most part. Actually, I think his feet left the ground which is a no-no). Parry had a couple of other nice hits earlier in the game also.

c. Javon Kearse. Did Kearse get hurt on every single play? Either way, he seemed to come back and disrupt many plays.

d. Offensive Line. Donovan McNabb had all kinds of time.

e. Sean Taylor. As I said last week, I don't like to put other teams notes in +'s and -'s, but safety Sean Taylor is going to be amazing. Every single Eagle player knew where he was on the field at all times.

Negatives:

a. That "Alligator Body" play by Todd Pinkston. This man cannot be on this team next year. Please. Just the sight of him makes me sick. I don't want to hear about the 80 yard bomb he caught either. Any other WR on the planet with legs that weren't sticks would've regained his balanced and scored. 2 plays later the Eagles turned the ball over so Pinky's falling ended up costing the Eagles.

b. No flow on offense. There was very little flow on offense especially in the fourth quarter. The Eagles seemed out of sync all game. A couple of 3 & outs in the 4th quarter kept the Redskins in the game.

c. Injuries. What is going on with this team? Last week I said that having 4 interior D Lineman rotating had been a positive. If Simon and Hollis Thomas miss any significant time it is going to be a huge blow to the defense.

Overall, probably one of McNabb's worst games of the year. He threw some uncharacteristically bad passes and probably should've been picked 2 or 3 times. I really think McNabb purposely throws the ball into the ground when he sees Freddie Mitchell open. Also, why was I happy when Freddie caught his only pass of the game, and the refs said it wasn't a first down. Freddie jumped up like a jackarse after what he thought was a 4 yard catch and celebrated a first down. He was wrong, it was a 2 yard catch and no first down. Freddie is absolutely just like that Leon guy on the Bud commercials.

Brian Westbrook's health is my main concern in every game here on out. I say get him 5-8 touches for the next two games and rest him the final week.

The Redskins really lost that game last night because the didn't go downfield at all. Jim Johnson actually took it easy on Patrick Ramsey as he didn't blitz all the time. The Eagles dropped back into zone coverage many times and Ramsey should've had time to find open WR's downfield. Credit to Kearse and the line for making Ramsey get rid of the ball.

Eagles now face the hated Cowboys in what could be the last remotely meaningful game until January 15th.

Around the NFL

The team in the NFC that scares me the most as an Eagles fan is the Atlanta Falcons. Not just because of Michael Vick, but because of how they beat the Raiders yesterday. T.J. Duckett and Warrick Dunn are becoming a great one-two punch with speed and power. If the Eagles continue to have DL issues, this could be a bad match up.

The team that doesn't scare me at all is the Minnesota Vikings. I got on Daunte Culpepper's case last week and he lost again yesterday this time at home to the struggling Seahawks. Culpepper didn't have a stellar game but this one wasn't his all his fault. What in the world is Mike Tice thinking with just over two minutes left, having Randy Moss throw an end around option pass?? Moss was picked off essentially killing any hopes of a victory. The Vikings had one more chance very late but Culpepper was sacked at the Seahawks 25 yard line. The Vikings better be careful; At 7-6 and a 4-5 conference record they're no lock to make the playoffs.

Two young running backs that could be future greats: Willis McGahee & Julius Jones. Nobody watches the Bills but McGahee has been awesome so far this year, and word is he's not even 100% healthy. Bill Parcells looks determined to prove Julius Jones was the steal of the draft in the second round this year. I would throw local boy Kevin Jones into the mix but it may still be a bit early.

Speaking of the Cowboys, a terrible loss which almost buries any playoff hopes for them. Losing to the Saints is unacceptable. The Saints are talented but Jim Haslett is a moron and should have been fired years ago.

As far as Buffalo is concerned, their season is on the line next week at Cincy. Should be a shootout if Carson Palmer is healthy and is able to suit up (Palmer sprained his ankle Sunday).

My favorite in a long time quote from last week was when Ricky Manning Jr. was asked about Rams QB Chris Chandler who was starting for the injured Marc Bulger: "I probably just played with him on Tecmo Bowl or something, one of those video games," the Carolina cornerback said, "and if y'all don't know Tecmo Bowl, it was one of the first Nintendo games."

The hottest non 12-1 team in football may be the Carolina Panthers. At 6-7 they are in prime position to land a Wild Card berth in the NFC. Two tough tests for the Panthers in the next two weeks. Next week at home versus Atlanta and on the road versus Tampa. If they come out of that 1-1 they should be fine for a playoff spot (finish the year at home vs. the Saints)

The San Diego Chargers continue their impressive charge with a 31-24 win over the Bucs. Once again, when needed the defense stepped up.

In probably the most boring game of the weekend, the Steelers continue to roll as the beat the Jets 17-6. There is something wrong with Chad Pennington's shoulder. Chad never had the strongest arm, but there were multiple throws on Sunday where he just didn't have any zip on the ball. The Jets are definitely hiding something there.

The Colts had their lowest output of the season only scoring 23 points versus the Texans. I think the Colts rip apart an overrated Ravens pass defense next week on Sunday night.

What a barnburner tonight two 4-8 teams pit against each other. KC and Tennessee may have seemed like a great match up in June, but today it looks like bad ratings for ABC.

Baseball - MMM

Tons of action around baseball. Phillies make a marginal pickup by signing Jon Lieber to a 3 year contract. I like Lieber but the rotation still needs someone at the top of the rotation. The pitcher the Phillies should be going after is Tim Hudson. Hudson is only 28 & has the makings of an ace, or at least a consistent 18 game winner.

As of right now, Tim Hidson is being sought by up to 8 teams. He is only under contract for one more year, then can become a free agent. The closest pursuer at the moment is the LA Dodgers who are dangling their potential stud ace Edwin Jackson.

Other player moves of note:

Seattle is looking to sign every offensive player under the sun. Richie Sexson may be signed today and Adrian Beltre may be next. Beltre wants Scott Boras money though. Incidentally, I think Richie Sexson will be a far better value/signing than Troy Glaus.

The Braves continue to shuffle their roster as they acquire closer Danny Kolb from the Brewers. Why would they acquire a closer you ask if they already have John Smoltz? Well, Smoltz will be returning to the rotation with the losses of Russ Ortiz and Jaret Wright. Look for the Braves to also try to sign Kevin Millwood.

Not much movement on Carlos Beltran. Boras is waiting for some other players to sign so that the market can be set for Beltran. As with Carl Pavano, who is likely heading to the Yankees, I think Beltran will land with them as well, pushing their payroll to about $225-250 million...

The next hottest rumor is the Red Sox are possibly looking to move Manny Ramirez and his enormous contract.

The Florida Marlins are also looking to deal A.J. Burnett. While Burnett has been injury prone he may end up being a great pickup by a team

NBA - Derreck Sura

The Sixers (8-12) sit in 3rd place in the Atlantic Division after a 2-2 week. They recovered nicely on the weekend from 2 embarrassing losses early in the week to Minnesota (acceptable) and Atlanta (totally unacceptable). Coach Jim O'Brien finally broke down and put Samuel Dalembert in the starting lineup for the first time all year on Friday night, and Sammy D responded with a great game (13 points, 14 rebounds, & 6 blocks in 35 minutes). It has come to my attention that people in Philly have been getting on Obie for not using Sam D more. Well maybe, just maybe, Obie was trying to send a message to Sam D, much the same as he was when he benched Kenny Thomas earlier in the year. Remember, everybody learns at a different pace, and if that's what it took for Obie to get his message across to those two, then I'm all for it. This week brings the Sixers: Denver, New York, @Milwaukee. 2-1 would be great, but beating the Knicks on Friday night is a must.

-The Los Angeles Lakers sent SG Kareem Rush to the Charlotte Bobcats for 2nd round draft picks in 2005 and 2008. I think this trade works well for both teams. Rush had been sulking ever since GM Mitch Kupchak decided not to pick up the 4th year option on his rookie contract before the season. He said publicly that is was a good thing, but his play in L.A. didn't suggest he was happy to be there anymore. Kareem should be a starter in Charlotte after he learns their system, and he will get enough minutes and touches to either sink or swim. The Lakers were most likely going to let Rush walk after the season anyway, so Kupchak getting 2 picks for him was a quality move. Especially since the Bobcats' 2005 pick should come relatively early on in the 2nd round.

-The most embarrassing loss of the season happened Friday night in Detroit, where the World Champs lost to the hapless Atlanta Hawks 72-88. Rasheed Wallace did not play, but that is no excuse be down by as many as 29 points, on your home floor, to the Hawks. The Pistons shot 30.7% from the field for the game, while allowing Atlanta to shoot a robust 55.1%. Detroit also set a franchise record for fewest points scored in a home game. Nothing like the pride of a champion!

-Most teams around the NBA have played 20 games now (give or take), so it's time for the first annual 'Quarter Pole Review'. Things aren't set in stone after 20 games by any means, but the unpredictability of the early season will soon be a distant memory, for a few reasons. First, all of the significant players around the league are in game shape, unless they have been injured. Next, coaches have settled on what they want their player rotation's to be (there are some exceptions). Those two factors lead to teams finding their groove, as everyone, coaches and players alike, know their roles. That is why you can expect to see the cream rise to the top, and the crap fall to the bottom over the next 20 games. I'll try and keep these brief because my mid-season review/preview will be more in depth.

ATLANTIC

New York (10-10) - I do my best to avoid watching this team. There's no real reason, except maybe payback for all those years of boring playoff basketball. Anyway, the Knicks have performed on par with what I expected, but GM Isiah Thomas is getting that itchy trigger finger again, so stay tuned.

Boston (8-11) - I've caught a few of their games while tuning in to watch their opponent. The Celtics can be exciting at times, and awful at others. Coach Doc Rivers moving Ricky Davis from the starting lineup to the 6th man "instant offense" role has improved their overall team chemistry.

Philadelphia (8-12) - I always do my best to remain objective in MMM, but I may have been guilty of drinking the Dr. Jack Ramsay poured Kool-Aid when I evaluated the Sixers before the season. I still have faith in coach Jim O'Brien's ability to get this team achieve the absolute most it's capable off. It's just that those capabilities might not be as substantial as what I originally thought.

New Jersey (7-13) - Even though Jason Kidd has only been playing 21.5 mpg, his return from knee surgery has given his teammates a major confidence boost that has the Nets playing like a different team. New Jersey has a chance to make the playoffs if Kidd isn't traded, but I still see Kidd being moved once he proves he's healthy.

Toronto (7-16) - Things have been as ugly for new head coach Sam Mitchell, as they have been for new GM Rob Babcock, and I don't see them getting better any time soon. I really don't like to watch many Raptor games, mainly because their announcers are terrible, eh.

CENTRAL

Cleveland (12-8) - The Cavaliers are in first place more so because the teams below them are
struggling, rather then their own stellar play. If you've missed all the other times I've said it, LeBron James is the real deal, and the sole reason I watch Cleveland play most nights.

Indiana (10-10) - The Pacers have hit the skids a bit recently (lost 7 in a row), but I'm not worried. As long as they can stay within striking distance of .500 until Jermaine O'Neal and Stephen Jackson come back, they should be fine.

Detroit (10-10) - The Pistons have got to be one of the most disappointing teams at the 'Quarter Pole'. Granted, they've had some issues to deal with, but they do not look like the defending NBA champions on a lot of nights. Coach Larry Brown has broken down and given Darko Milicic some meaningful minutes lately, which is reason enough for me to tune in.

Milwaukee (6-12) - Coach Terry Porter still has his team playing hard and competing every night, but the Bucks don't have the depth to sustain the injuries they've had. I don't watch this team that much, but Milwaukee is the type of club that nobody wants to play because if you take the night off, they'll beat you.

Chicago (4-14) - More of the same. The Bulls just don't know how to win. Sure they have a few young players worth watching, but that doesn't mean I do. The only story worth following with this team is what GM John Paxson decides to do with Eddy Curry and Tyson Chandler.

SOUTHEAST

Miami (15-7) - Coach Stan Van Gundy inserting Damon Jones into the starting lineup has given the Heat offense more fire power, but it has also removed the spark Damon provided off the bench. Miami's performance thus far has been pretty much what I expected, that's why I hardly, if ever, watch them.

Washington (12-6) - This is by far my favorite team to watch in the East. The Wizards are a very dangerous team on offense, but they haven't figured out how to win close games quite yet. When Etan Thomas returns from his abdominal injury, he'll provide Washington with another banger down low to go along with Brendan Haywood.

Orlando (13-7) - When I evaluated the Magic in the pre-season I didn't think they had enough rebounding to be competitive. What I didn't count on was 19 year old rookie Dwight Howard putting up double digit rebounds most nights. I'll admit, I haven't watched this team play near enough, but it's on my to do list.

Charlotte (4-14) - Believe it or not, the Bobcats are not that bad to watch for an expansion team. C Primoz Brezec and PF Emeka Okafor have developed a nice chemistry, and actually form a quality big man tandem. They still have no go to guy, but GM/coach Bernie Bickerstaff has Charlotte headed in the right direction.

Atlanta (4-16) - The Hawks annoy me too much to watch. They are just plain dreadful, an abomination to the NBA landscape. I don't know what I can say that's positive, except that there's only 62 more games until the off season begins.

SOUTHWEST

San Antonio (17-5) - Even though much lauded free agent signing Brent Barry has given them nothing so far, the Spurs are the best team in the league at the 'Quarter Pole'. Only a significant injury will keep this group from winning their division.
Dallas (14-8) - The Mavericks have improved their team defense, but finding a replacement for PG Steve Nash has proved difficult. Rookie Devin Harris beat out Jason Terry in training camp, but GM Donnie Nelson still felt compelled to deal for veteran Darrell Armstrong. Injuries have slowed the development of team chemistry, but Dallas has enough depth and scoring to always be competitive.

Houston (9-12) - Another nominee for the most disappointing team at the 'Quarter Pole'. I like to see Yao Ming's development as a player, which I why I watch the Rockets as much as I do, but coach Jeff Van Gundy has made me alter my viewing habits. They are just so damn boring that I can't stand to watch them play Eastern Conference ball in the West anymore.
Memphis (9-13) - The Grizzlies are 4-2 under new coach Mike Fratello, but it remains to be seen how the players that are receiving reduced minutes in his new rotation are going to handle their limited role's long term. Look for GM Jerry West to move Jason Williams and Bonzi Wells by the trading deadline

New Orleans (1-18) - Injuries have killed the Hornets, plain and simple, but it's not like they were going to make the playoffs in the West anyway. I say we end the suspense and move them to St. Louis or Kansas City already.

NORTHWEST

Seattle (17-4) - I think it's safe to say the Sonics are for real. Top of the Western Conference for real? I'm not ready to go that far, but they will be in hunt for a playoff spot all year. I watch this team a lot, and the main difference from last year is that the attitude that Danny Fortson plays with has rubbed off on the entire roster, so they no longer get pushed around by teams with superior size.

Minnesota (13-7) - I get the feeling that the Timbewolves have lost their appetite for the regular season. Kevin Garnett still comes to play every night, but I can't say the same for some of his 'mates. It really doesn't matter as far as I'm concerned because Minnesota is still the deepest team in the league, and will be ready come playoff time.

Denver (12-8) - After a slow start the Nuggets have really turned things around and seem to be hitting their stride. Their lack of consistent outside shooting is going to keep them from becoming an elite team, but their front court depth should be enough to get them in the playoffs.
Portland (10-9) - It's the same old same old for the Trail Blazers. They still play to the level of their competition (up or down) nightly. I'm hoping that owner Paul Allen fires GM John Nash and team President Steve Patterson sooner rather then later, then makes the move for Detroit's assistant GM John Hammond, because I'm so sick and tired of watching this bad mix of players.

Utah (9-12) - News that All-Star SF Andrei Kirilenko may miss an addition month while his right knee heals, is not what the Jazz wanted to hear, at all. I still believe this is one of the best teams in the West when healthy, but I worry about them falling too far behind in playoff race while AK-47 is out.

PACIFIC

Phoenix (17-3) - The Suns are the most entertaining team to watch in the entire NBA. They put at least one huge run on every team they play, usually in the 2nd half. I'm concerned with the amount of minutes their starters are averaging though, because with the pace Phoenix plays at, they can't afford to have Steve Nash or Amare Stoudemire break down.

Sacramento (14-6) - The Kings are still a very dangerous club that beats all the teams they should. However, because they do lack depth, their starters have to play so many minutes during the game, that they don't have enough energy down the stretch to close out the elite teams in the West anymore.

Lakers (12-8) - Kobe Bryant has been doing what everyone said he wouldn't, which is share the ball with lesser teammates. L.A. is still working on team chemistry, and when Vlade Divac gets in shape, they will have yet another adjustment to make. It's hard to tell if this is a playoff team or not, but one thing that is certain, these Lakers play hard every night, which is a very welcome sight to my eyes.

Clippers (11-8) - This is the most surprising team in the league for my money. I'm very interested to see how L.A. performs after Kerry Kittles and Chris Kaman are worked back in to the regular rotation. If Corey Maggette can develop into a legitimate crunch time go to guy, the Clips will continue to surprise.

Golden State (6-14) - Coach Mike Montgomery has had a pretty rough transition to the NBA so far. Whether it be managing game situations, or settling on a rotation, Monty has seemed a little clueless to the ways of the pro game at times. Then again, look at the Warriors' roster. Maybe he's actually doing a good job?

-Have I not been giving your team enough run? Then shoot me an email. I'll watch your club for a week, and report what I see in the following MMM.

NHL Week in Review By: Ed Wasser

- The NHL players association gave a CBA proposal to the owners. They're currently mulling it over. We'll see. Oh..by the way, if the NHL goes through with the 25 game, jackass season that some are proposing and the Flyers won the Stanley Cup I wouldn't even care. It would be such a stupid waste of time.

- The moment you've all been waiting for....the answer to the 'Caddyshack' controversy. For the record I received more e-mails about last week's little 'Caddyshack' blurb then about any other thing I've ever written in this space combined. I got 2 e-mails. One guy called me a baboon HE THINKS I'M HIS WIFE!! Sorry, I was channeling the ghost of Rodney Dangerfield (God rest his soul). Seriously, I received about 7 e-mails and I appreciated the feedback very much. Most contained the type of compliments guys give other guys. You know like..that article wasn't the WORST thing I've ever read..so that was pretty cool. Anyhow, all the e-mails centered around one of two things or both, the revision to the bet Al Czervick yelled to the Judge right before Danny Noonan putted and/or the fact that Ty Webb tells Noonan "if you miss it...we lose" right before he putts. Now it's true no matter what that if Noonan missed the putt Czervick and Webb would have lost the bet. If the new bet was for the one putt obviously they lose if Noonan misses; if the new bet was still for the entire match then Noonan/Webb/Czervick would have lost on a two putt. Got it? Good. So I got 'Caddyshack' from On Demand and fast forwarded to the end. That's right, I paid $4.99 for a movie to hear one sentence. No, no, no...please put your checkbooks away, I don't need you to send me any donations although I appreciate the offers. And before you ask the answer is yes...I stopped fast forwarding to watch the Lacy Underall/Danny Noonan scene when they're in the Judge's bed. I didn't want to do it....but I felt I OWED it to them. Sorry, just channeling a little Ted Knight (God bless his soul too). Anyhow, this is the way the scene in question plays out EXACTLY. Al Czervick's exact quote to the Judge was "hey Judge, double or nothing HE MAKES IT, 80 thousand". To which the Judge replies "YOU'RE ON!! YOU'RE ON!!" So it's over, the bet went from the complete match to just that putt in one sentence. The controversy is dead. But the Judge still had a beef. A major beef if you ask me. As MMM subscriber Mark Voelcker pointed out the USGA rules clearly state that the time a golfer has to get to his ball after a stroke is "the time it takes to arrive at the ball walking at a normal pace". A player can be penalized two strokes for slow play. Anybody even fringely familiar with that movie knows that Danny Noonan did not approach his ball at all, let alone at a "normal walking pace" so the Judge had a legit gripe because Noonan's time should have been up while the explosions were going off. Moral of the story....never play a golf match for a lot of dough without a sanctioned PGA or USGA official on hand.

- Quick comment on the Denny Neagle soliciting a prostitute thing. Look, I'm not against a guy trying to get a little action even after receiving the "2001 Colorado Rockies Good Guy Award". And I'm not against a guy paying for a little action, not that I ever would, you know, being a famous author and all. Hell, I'm not even against a guy cheating on his wife....after all what do I care? What I'm against is a multi-million dollar athlete paying for a $40 street whore that's uglier then a mule's ass. Did you see that hooker that got arrested with Neagle? She looked like the host of 'Tales From The Crypt' after a 6 week Cuervo 1800 bender in Tijuana. And Neagle looked at her and thought $40 was acceptable? Good Grief!!! In a few weeks when Barry Bonds gets called on the carpet for his less than believable story about taking a steroid "cream" without any clue of what it was he should bring that hooker's mug shot to the hearing and point to it and say "this proves that pro athletes put their bodies in harm's way without knowing what the hell they're doing all the time!!"

- PS...any person commenting on the Denny Neagle arrest and saying "no girl in the world is worth losing the remainder of a $19 million contract" is obviously not familiar with MTV VJ Vanessa Mannillo. She'd be worth cutting off my left thumb.

- Urban Meyer rejected Notre Dame. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! (Slapping my knee with vigor) Once more, WITH FEELING!!!! Urban Meyer rejected Notre Dame! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! (Clapping my hands like a mechanical monkey slamming cymbals) Oh boy...(wiping away tears)...that's good stuff!! Here's what it is....Notre Dame is like Raquel Welch. 30 years ago she was really something, quite fetching as a matter of fact and the hottest thing in show business. But father time is a terribly cruel master. Unfortunately Notre Dame, like Raquel, was the last to know that the sheen had worn off that apple a long time ago. Urban Meyer is like Brad Pitt. He can have anybody he wants....ANYBODY he wants. There's no reason for him to settle for some old, plastic surgery hag. In fact, Raquel would have to have a lot of guts to even pursue Pitt. 20 years ago maybe but now? Is she kidding?!?! Sure, you and I would be into Notre Welch but that's because we can't get a job at the University of Jennifer Aniston so we have to take what we can get, even though Welch is 64 years old. OK...this analogy is out of control. It's over.

- Terrell Owens made a bet with Eagles coach Andy Reid that if he scored 15 touchdowns this season he would wear a skin tight cat suit to practice. Owens has 14 touchdowns so one more and Reid has to wear the cat suit. The reason I know this is because the national media has mentioned it 17,276 times since last Friday and the local Philadelphia media has mentioned it 121,770 times since yesterday. WE GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- If you took everything that I know about today's NBA it wouldn't fit on the head of a pin. But being ignorant of something has never made me shy away from having a, bang my fist on the desk, opinion about it. What Tracy McGrady and the Houston Rockets did, scoring 13 points in like 54 seconds to beat the Spurs last Thursday night, was one of the most incredible things I've ever seen in sports. WOW!!!!

- (Associated Press) Latrell Sprewell of the Minnesota Timberwolves was suspended for last Tuesday's Mavericks game for yelling at a female fan during a game two Saturdays ago to "Suck my 'shama lama ding dong!!" Of course being a female fan of the NBA the woman took Sprewell up on his offer in the team bus later that night. The remark was fully audible on KTLA television but fortunately since it was during a Clippers game nobody in Los Angeles heard it. The problem was compounded by the fact that when NBA commissioner David Stern was informed of the incident he was overheard saying in a disbelieving tone 'you gotta be 'bleeping' kidding me!!'

- The University of Illinois hired Ron Zook as their new football coach and he immediately pissed off almost every citizen of the state when he referred to the school as the "University of Ill - a - Noise" at the press conference. You know....I knew I would rue the day that I sold my website FIRERONZOOK.com. Dammit!! Oh well, at least I'll have FIRECHARLIEMANUEL.com and FIREJIMOBRIEN.com up and running soon.

- Just to show you what a Mickey Mouse organization the Phillies are there's this. They trade for Kenny Lofton to patrol centerfield which is great....if this were 1996. Back in those days Lofton could make from first base to home quicker than Brian Urlacher on his first date with Paris Hilton. Now Lofton will probably platoon with...I can't believe I'm going to write this...Jason Michaels. Oh my God...I GOTTA GO!!!.................OK, I'm back...I just had to go vomit; I'll be OK. Then the Phillies sign Jon Lieber which I guess is a good signing, I mean he pitched well when it counted for the Yanks last year, but Lieber is like the Ashley Simpson to Carl Pavano's Jessica Simpson. Sure, you wouldn't kick Ashley out of bed but she's junior varsity, as is Lieber, at least in terms of marquis value. But this is why the Phillies are the longest running joke in this city's history. Back story for those on the West Coast....in Philadelphia every stadium, old and new, that houses the major sports teams are within, I'd say, a one square quarter mile radius of each other. You could see the Phillies, Sixers, and Eagles in one day and spend more time walking to get beer from the concession stands then you'd spend walking to each stadium... and that's not even a slight exaggeration. So Veterans Stadium was imploded back in March and the job of hiring a company to take away the debris and create a very much needed new parking lot fell on the Phillies. The job was supposed to be done before this year's Eagles season started. For those of you that don't follow sports all that closely I'll just let you know that Eagles' season has already started. And as for the much needed parking lot the Phillies were supposed to provide 13 weeks ago? Well, it's not even close to completion. It's not even close to being close. I'm hearing scuttlebutt that I can not 100% confirm that the Phillies have determined that paying the fine from city for dragging their feet is cheaper than actually cleaning up the crap. Besides, what do they care that there's a disgusting pile of fenced in dirt and concrete next to all the stadiums? Baseball season doesn't start until April and they couldn't care less about an eye sore in the city. This something the Philadelphia Soul, our arena football representative, wouldn't let happen. Ri "BLEEPING" diculous.

- My Dad's horse, Fairway Miss, is running in the 9th race today at Philadelphia Park. The race goes off around 3:45 PM Eastern Time. As of this writing on Sunday she's going off with 8 -1 odds. The thing that gets me is she will have a new jockey because her usual jockey, David Mello, will be riding another horse in the same race. This is after he told the trainer that he wanted to ride Fairway Miss because she was a better horse. In short...we got shafted. That's cool though. The new jockey is a 17 year old kid named Frankie Pennington who quit high school to be a jockey and is now driving around Philadelphia in a BMW 740i and thus far this year has won about $175,000. Good move kid!! A full break down of the race will be in next weeks MMM.